Realness by Gaïa Lamarre

Realness is a self-portrait project by Gaïa Lamarre shot at Ecal.

This fantasized metaphorical journey expresses my doubts and indecisions about increasingly conscious identity questions. Inspired by the spiritual, social and political place of gender non-conforming people throughout history and my own experience, trying to reconnect with my true self. I created this new world, a place where I don't need to identify myself. Where I'm not afraid of being judged, where I’m not afraid of others. Where I don't feel fear, far from this binary model. That world is safe. Built on the memories of those who, before me, also simply wanted to live their lives in an authentic way, without wondering if the next day would be their last.

IMAGE & WORDS Gaïa Lamarre

Trees became towers, rivers became borders. Protecting myself from the other world, the world that you know, the world that I knew. Protecting myself from my own mind and the minds of others.

This new world is mine, and it could be yours too if you don’t feel like the ordinary world was made for you. This kingdom is free of interrogation, free of judgement, free of fear, and free of the word freedom. They’ve invented too many words to define the indefinable and to make the natural a stranger.

I’m barricading myself in from what’s outside, but I’m so conscious of everything that I’m protecting myself from. Creating this castle on top of these graves, so we don’t forget. So we won’t forgive.

Will I end up like my sisters? Will I be burned? Will I be shot?
I don’t know yet, but what I do know is that I can only die if I lived.
And I’m not born yet.